Thursday, March 12, 2009

How to make a Cute Face

Instructions
Difficulty: Easy

Warm Up Your Face
Step1 : Stretch all the muscles in your face. You don't want to pull a temporalis muscle at a critical moment of Cute Face.
Step2 : Vigorously rub your cheeks with the palms of your hands. This increases blood flow, and gives you a nice natural blush as a base for your maneuvers. If you are especially fair skinned, you may want to skip this step. It might do more harm to your cause than good.
Step3 : Slowly rotate your head side to side, stretching out your neck. The face muscles get all of the glory, but without the neck you wouldn't be able to look your audience in the eyes.

Now the Cute Face
Step1 : Pull the corners of your mouth down slightly while still smiling. Be careful not to pull them down too far, unless you are going for the Pouty Cute Face.
Step2 : Tilt your head to either side, and slightly down. This will cause even more cuteness.
Step3 : Open your eyes wide, face your target and say "ple-e-e-ase?" or something similarly cute. Be careful not to whine, because that kills the whole maneuver.
Step4 : Bat your eyelashes a few times. This will bring down the house.

Tips & Warnings

* Practice in front of a mirror. It takes time to develop a cuteness against which resistance is futile.
* You know what cute is. If you think you're cute, than you are cute. Use the power within.
* Some people have developed such unprecedented levels of cuteness that they inspire stalkers. Be careful who you use your power on.
* Cuteness has been determined to fade over time. Peak cuteness is generally somewhere around 5 years old, but can extend well into a person's retirement.

(Found this hilarious bit of information while trying to locate my 'dead' blog, so why not mirror it)

Sunday, April 20, 2008

Frank Zappa and Mechanical Engineering

What connects both?

Yes, the answer is 'Fart'.

In his own words,

"The manly art of fart-burning. Compression, ignition, combustion and exhaust."

Gaitonde will surely be impressed.

Chemical Analysis of Fart!

Well, I am obsessed with this. I think I find this really amusing for some reason I can't narrow down on.


The composition of fart varies dramatically among individuals. Five simple odourless gases are their major components. Flatulence produces a mixture of gases such as nitrogen, carbon dioxide, methane, oxygen, hydrogen and hydrogen sulphide. The gas methane combusts, forming water and carbon dioxide.

CH4(g) + 2O2(g) → CO2(g) + 2H2O(l)

2H2S(g) + 3O2(g) → 2SO2(g) + 2H2O(l)

The odour associated with flatus is due to hydrogen sulfide, skatole, indole, volatile amines and short-chain fatty acids. These substances are detectable by olfactory neurons in concentrations as low as 10 parts per billion, hydrogen sulfide being the most odorous. So blame them for all the disgusting smell!

C'mon baby, Light my fire!

Light My Fire
(The Doors)

You know that it would be untrue
You know that I would be a liar
If I was to say to you
Girl, we couldn't get much higher
Come on baby, light my fire
Come on baby, light my fire
Try to set the night on fire

The time to hesitate is through
No time to wallow in the mire
Try now we can only lose
And our love become a funeral pyre
Come on baby, light my fire
Come on baby, light my fire
Try to set the night on fire, yeah

The time to hesitate is through
No time to wallow in the mire
Try now we can only lose
And our love become a funeral pyre
Come on baby, light my fire
Come on baby, light my fire
Try to set the night on fire, yeah

You know that it would be untrue
You know that I would be a liar
If I was to say to you
Girl, we couldn't get much higher
Come on baby, light my fire
Come on baby, light my fire
Try to set the night on fire
Try to set the night on fire
Try to set the night on fire
Try to set the night on fire

I would like to first apologise to all The Doors fans out there. Believe me, I am big fan of The Doors and absolutely adore their songs. Just recently, while studying for my endsems, I happened to read something which has ever since kept me in two minds about this particular song.
Look at the following picture.
If you just think, it is a joke, then my friend you are wrong.
Well it does happen.
Its scientifically proven.
Fart lighting, (also called fart-burning, blue dart, blue flame, blue angel and flatus ignition) is the practice of setting fire to the gases produced by flatulence often producing a blue hue.

So next time, during a date when you girlfriend or boyfriend says, "Set me on fire, baby!", you know what he/she means and prolly what to do even!!